Disjointed Digression

It appears that some of the new Harry Potter books were misprinted.  As in they are missing some pages.  Some were missing as many as 30 pages.

From the article:
“Printing and distributing 12 million copies of a book is a Herculean task, and it is not surprising that some books would have printing errors,” Scholastic spokeswoman Sara Sinek said in a statement.”

She said that as of Tuesday, the company had only heard of “a few hundred” instances of books with missing pages.

Sinek said Scholastic is happy to replace any book with a defect and advised customers to take defective books back to the place where they were purchased.

Leanne Greer, 36… said she finished reading page 306, then discovered the next 33 pages of the book were missing.

“I just kind of freaked out,” said Greer, a Purdue University graduate with degrees in elementary education and English. “My husband said, ‘Why are you screaming?’ He said ‘I thought one of the kids was hurt.’”

Luckily for Greer, she had a backup for her store-bought copy; she had ordered another copy online.

“I’m just that psychotic about it,” she said.

I think this line sums it up “I’m just that psychotic about it”. 

I’ll admit I read the first book and I watched the second movie.  Oddly enough I can’t make it through the first movie, or the second book. The only reason I read the book/saw the movie was because the woman I was dating at the time was really into Harry Potter.  So I was being supportive, and no, I was not doing research for some sort of sexual roleplaying! I don’t need to wear a pointy hat and hold a wand in the bedroom!  But I digress… 

The lady mentioned in the article bought a “back-up” copy of a book.  It’s not like she couldn’t go to her nearest Evil Wal-Mart(™) and pick up another copy, or just take the damaged one back to where she bought it, if she wasn’t keeping it as a collectors item.

My theory that people are fucking nuts is being confirmed more and more each day!

Last week Candy and I went to the Evil Wal-Mart™. We try to go later in the evening when less people are there, because I hate crowds, and I hate people. As we are looking for a parking space, we note that there are a lot of people in the parking lot, going in and coming out of the store. Not an “OMG riot at Evil Wal-Mart™!” amount of people, but more than usual. Candy wonders “Why are there so many people at (Evil)Wal-Mart(™)?”

“Because it’s hot.” I reply

“You don’t go to (Evil)Wal-Mart(™), when its hot.” she retorts.

And I mumble “When I was a kid and it was hot” and I mumble something.

“What did you say?” she asks.

I’ve since come up with a way of trying to tell if she is mad at me because she heard me utter things that I should not be saying to her. It’s actually easier than I thought it would be, I just ask “What did you hear?”

She looks me straight in the face and says “When I was a kid and it was hot, we’d go to Mortamus Martigan’s.”

Trying not to laugh I repeat what I had originally said, but much clearer “When I was a kid and it was hot, we’d go to (Evil)Wal-Mart(™) and buy water guns”.

“What the Hell is a Mortamus Martigan’s?” I ask

A little frustrated Candy replies “Hell, I don’t know, I thought it might be one of those places…”

Those places. Ah, yes I know those places all too well…

“What kinda place?” I ask.

“You know! A place you play stuff, games, they have names like that.”

And I know exactly what she meant, really I did. But for the life of me, I could not think of the word “arcade”. I could only think of an arcade I used to frequent in my younger days “Odyssey”. We reached a silent agreement, neither of us could bring out the right word, but we knew what was meant.

A few days ago I was going through Google Reader (which I have built into gmail via a Greasemonkey script for firefox but I digress…) and I came across a Digg.com article that sounded somewhat interesting. The title was “RIAA Spends Thousands To Obtain $300 Judgment“  Due to the way the RSS feed works (I guess), whenever I click a link in Google reader, it sends me to the comments page for an article.  On the top and sides of the comments page are Google ads.  I guess I should be less lazy and get some sort of inline ad blocker… again I digress. 

One of the ads on the side read

“God can help your credit”  and had a link to http://www.christiancreditconsultants.com/.

I honestly can’t say why this stuck me as funny.  In both a ha-ha funny and that’s odd funny way.  I have nothing against Christianity, or religion.  But there are just some things that I don’t associate with God.  One of those is my credit score.  Somehow I don’t think that God would be into fixing people’s credit.  I think that if someone were to ask God for help on their credit (I know, know that there have been some prayers like that) that God would turn it into a lesson a la ”you dug your own hole, now climb out of it.”  I doubt he would just snap his fingers and fix the credit problems. 

Which in turn makes me wonder how a Christian credit counselor works… Do they call the creditor and ask them to do the “Christian thing” and lower the interest rate?  What if the creditor is a Buddhist, a Muslim, a Jew, or anything other than Christian?  My bet is that it’s a regular credit counseling service offering its services under a religious name.

From the What the Fuck?! department.
Apparently British forces are being blamed for bringing giant, man eating badgers to Iraq. At least according to this article. Which has a pic and a link to a youtube video. I haven’t watched the video yet.

Some of the interesting parts of the article:

British forces operating around the southern Iraqi city of Basra are being blamed for the arrival of a plague of vicious badgers that stalk the streets at night, attacking livestock and even humans.

Local farmers have caught and killed several of the beasts, but this has done nothing to dispel rumours of a bear-like monster that eats humans and was, according to the local rumour mill, released into the area by UK forces to spread panic.

“They are native to the region but rare in Iraq. They’re nocturnal carnivores with a fearsome reputation, but they don’t stalk humans and carry them back to their lair,” Major Gell said.

So far neither the scientists nor the soldiers have been able to calm the populace’s fears.

“I was sleeping at night when this strange animal hit me on my head. I have not seen such an animal before. My husband hurried to shoot it but it was as swift as a deer,” said Suad Hassan, a 30-year-old housewife. “It is the size of a dog but his head is like a monkey. It runs so quickly.”

Sattar Jabbar, a 50-year-old farmer from Abu Sakhar north of Basra, believes the badger can tackle even large prey. “I saw it three days ago at night attacking animals. It even ate a cow. It tore the cow up piece by piece. I tried to shoot it with my gun but it ran away into the orchards. I missed it,” he said.

Major Gell said: “We have not released giant badgers in Basra, and nor have we been collecting eggs and releasing serpents into the Shatt al-Arab river.”

What the Hell? I can possibly see someone describing a badger as “the size of a dog with a head of a monkey” if they have never seen one. I can even believe that a badger would attack animals, but a cow?! Unless it was a small cow, I just can’t imagine a badger tearing across a field and taking down a cow. Well, I couldn’t imagine it until now.

Of course when I first read this, I thought that the badgers would be eight feet tall, and eating humans exclusively. That sounds like a really cheesy sci-fi movie “Attack of the Giant Badgers!” But I digress… Honestly I sort of figure that soon someone will come out and say that this is a hoax. What the hell did that British Major meant about releasing serpents into the river? If somewhere in the story it mentioned mushrooms, I’d say for sure it was a hoax that was tipping its hat to that flash animation badger, badger, mushroom, snake.

This weekend, Candy and I went to see Transformers. Of course we went to the Alamo Drafthouse to see it. The Alamo Drafthouse is such a good theater that it got mentioned on Heroes! When you go to the Drafthouse, you really need to get to the theater early, not just to get good seats either. Instead of showing some boring ads for Coke, or dumbass trivia type of “game” the Drafthouse shows things that are somewhat relevant to the movie you are going to see. Also you need to look over the menu and put in your order. But I digress…

When we got to the theater, they were showing clips from the Transformers cartoon. Also they showed clips form the animated Transformers movie. Some of the other things they showed were Japanese transformers clips, and for some reason parts from Turkish Star Wars. What was cool was that the clip they showed from the animated movie was the fight between Optimus Prime and Megatron.

About the movie itself:
Transformers was one of those movies that I was not sure Hollywood would be able to pull off. The nostalgia surrounding the cartoon and toys would draw a lot of people in, but if the treatment of said nostalgia was too hokey it could have been a disaster. I have to say that I liked the toys and cartoon as a kid, but I’m not a hardcore Transformer enthusiast (i.e. I can’t name but a handful of the characters.) I had heard that the movie was good, but I had my reservations as it was being marketed as a Summer Blockbuster. Summer Blockbuster usually means that before you leave the house you need to take your disbelief, tie it up, and shove it in a closet, suspending it just won’t cut it. Keeping that in mind as well as realizing that this film was directed by the same person who directed Armageddon, I went to see the movie. I was nicely surprised. It was a good, fun movie. For me the special effects were the star. Candy said that what made the movie was Shia LaBeouf’s performance. I think it was a combination of his performance, the special effects and the humor. There was a lot more humor than I was expecting. The storyline that was put forth was not too bad, although it did kinda have an Independence Day feel to it on some parts. For the most part the acting was good. Some of the action sequences made me want to have a rewind/pause button so I could tell exactly what was going on they were so fast. I really liked the movie. And contrary to my belief Candy did too. It’s not that often that we leave a movie and she admits she wants to live it. After we left the movie she said “I want a transformer! A real one!” Honestly I think that’s the best review I could give… her reaction.

This morning we woke up somewhat early. With the rain we decided to stay home and do nothing. Loki decided to change that for us, involuntarily. Loki’s nictitating membrane (third eyelid) was partially covering his left eye, and it looked like it was stuck (Similar to the picture, which is not Loki.) Not knowing what to do we tried massaging his closed eye trying to get the membrane to return to the corner of his eye. That had no effect. So Candy thought that if we put some of her eye/contact drops in his eye maybe that would help. When we tried to do that, he just closed his eye and his head got wet. So Candy called the emergency veterinarian, and they said to bring him in. So we packed him into his carrier and got him into the car. While Candy drove, I had Loki in the back seat so I could see him. We had gotten about three blocks form the house and I looked into the carrier and Loki’s eye looked normal now. So I pulled him out of the carrier and got a good look, and sure enough he was fine, so we turned around and went home. We decided that if the problem came back, we’d just threaten to take him to vet again.

A few months back I read Red Dragon by Thomas Harris. I decided to give it a shot because I saw a few minutes of Manhunter on TV. If you are not familiar with the movie history of Hannibal Lec(k)tor, it goes something like this Manhunter, Silence of the Lambs, Hannibal, Red Dragon, Hannibal Rising. Candy and I decided to watch Manhunter and Red Dragon this past weekend and compare the two.

Manhunter was made in 1986, and it was based on the novel Red Dragon. In this film, William Petersen plays the protagonist of Will Graham. Graham is a retired FBI profiler who was known for making impossible mental leaps to catch serial killers. On of the more famous ones he caught was Hannibal Lecktor (that was how it was spelled in this movie, in all the subsequent movies it is spelled Lector). So Graham is brought out of retirement to catch one more serial killer, since the FBI has no way of figuring out how he chooses his victims. That is the basic plot and premise of the novel and the 2002 film Red Dragon.

Manhunter was made in the middle of the 1980′s a time when men wore hot pink, neon was the light of choice and studio musicians filled up soundtracks. Manhunter has all of that, horrid fashion, cheesy music, weird sets that don’t really make sense and really bad music. The only song that is not bad is In-a-gadda-da-vida, the rest of the music is crap, and seems WAY out of place. If you pulled the music from the movie (except In-a-gadda-da-vida, it actually serves a purpose) the movie would be tons better. The acting is not bad, for the cast of B listers. I liked Peterson (now more well know for being on CSI) as Graham, I thought Brian Cox did some scenes as Lecktor better than Anthony Hopkins did then as Lector in Red Dragon. And Tom Noonan was a very creepy Dollarhyde (aka the bad guy). The problem is that the movie drags out and is not well paced. At the end, it deviates from the book, and has a Hollywood ending, that feels like it was just put on there to put the movie goer out of their misery and let them go home. The movie deviates from the book in several places, yet in others it stays true to form.

Red Dragon, made in 2002 does a much better job of sticking to the book. Sure there are some deviations, but not nearly as many as Manhunter. This updated version has more subtle music that doesn’t jump out at you and say “Hey! You remember that crappy music you danced to at the Junior High “prom”, you know the stuff you tried to slow dance with Jane Whatshername, while you not so slyly ran you and over the back of her dress seeing if you could feel a bra, and if so where the clasp was in the very slim chance you might get to try to unclasp it later. That’s me, I’m that music!” Also the caliber of actor’s has gone up. Anthony Hopkins returns to play Hannibal Lector, even though this movie is set before Silence of the Lambs. Edward Norton plays Graham this time around. Even though I generally like Edward Norton, I found Peterson as a more believable Graham. Ralph Fiennes is a less creepy but more psychotic Dollarhyde.  And Harvey Kietel replaces Dennis Farina as Crawford, the FBI man who draws Graham back in.

One thing that deviates from the novel is the beginning of the movie, where the audience is shown how Graham catches Lector. The rest of the movie follows the book very well. The acting, is good, if a little stiff in a few places. Unlike Manhunter, Red Dragon is very well paced, and an all-round better movie. There were some parts of the story (in both movies) that do not seem plausible (e.g. Candy pointed out that getting a finger print from a human eye was very unlikely. Since she used to work in a crime lab, I defer to her.)

I’d recommend Red Dragon over Manhunter if you want to see a good movie based on Thomas Harris’ book. But if you are looking for something that will remind you of the glory days of Miami Vice, check out Manhunter.

So, the iphone comes out today.  To quote Adam Sandler from The Wedding Singer “Whoopee-dee-doo!”  

A few reasons I will not be getting an iphone anytime soon:

1. I already have a cell phone that I didn’t pay $500 or $600 dollars for. 
2. I already have an ipod that I didn’t pay $500 or $600 dollars for. 
3. Both my cell phone and ipod work just fine. 
4. I only use my cell phone to call people and the occasional text message, I don’t need the Internet on a phone…yet.
5. I don’t use AT&T as my cell provider, nor am I willing to change.

I’m not an Apple fanboy, nor am I an Apple hater.  It’s just that there is no way I could justify getting an iphone.  It has less memory than the ipod I already have.  Speaking of the ipod I already have; even though I’ve started using it more recently, I don’t use it but maybe an hour a day, so I don’t see a reason to have it with me at all times. Now, if they made a 80GB touch display ipod that wasn’t a phone I think I’d be interested.  Maybe that is on the way.  I’d like to see a music only version, but I doubt they will do that since they have the video already built in.  I just can’t see watching a movie or TV show on a screen that small. The one thing I hope comes from this is that we’ll see less of those annoying iphone commercials. 

On a side note, there is a guy waiting in line in New York City that is first in line and has been for most of this week.  But he’s doing it just to be first in line, not for an iphone.  He has been dubbed “the iloser”.  Honestly I think that everyone in any line waiting for an iphone should be considered an iloser. 

So I was driving home today and I got behind a BMW Z3.

Those are not all that rare around here, especially if you consider how many I used to see in the Dell parking lot where the sales people parked. But I digress. This Z3 had a vanity license plate from out of state that said FLUFBUT. As I wondered what the Hell flufbut means, and why you’d want it as your license plate, my eyes wandered up to convertible top. Along the bottom of the plastic window was duct tape. Not just a strip, but what looked like three layers. As my eye wandered up to the red light to see if it was green I noticed that on the window part there were 2 strips of what appeared to be clear packing tape. What struck me about this was that here was a car that cost quite a bit, with a baffling vanity plate, but a vanity plate nonetheless which indicated money, yet it had a decidedly broke-ass fix on the window. I was half tempted to follow them to wherever they were going and ask the driver “What the hell does FLUFBUT mean?”

Here’s a headline that makes you wince Cops Raid Wrong Place, Kick Man in Groin.  Apparently the police burst into the wrong apartment, denting the front door and using flash grenades that left two large stains and “subdued” the two people in the apartment. 

From the article:
Police spokesman Hal Dalton said something must have gone amiss in the briefing beforehand. “We don’t know how the mistake was made,” Dalton said.

Silvia Bernal, 30, told The (Annapolis) Capital that about 15 officers burst through the front door of her apartment while she was cooking dinner about 8:20 p.m. She said the officers kicked her husband in the groin while she fled into a bedroom and barred the door with her body.

Then she said both of them were taken to the ground and handcuffed. The Capital said a police officer went outside and realized they had raided the wrong residence.

Dalton said they were supposed to have raided a different apartment and said the incident was regrettable.

What kind of threat do you have to pose to a police officer for him to kick you in the nuts to take you down?  My guess is that the cops were so pumped up that anyone in the apt was a threat in their minds, so the took everyone down and asked questions later.  At least they didn’t shoot first, then ask questions. 

Also from the article:
When officers and the city’s tactical squad went to the right unit, they said it was empty.

No shit? What criminal would see their neighbors apartment getting raided, and say “Sucks to be them, I wonder if they meant to come here?”  I bet they took off as soon as they saw the police cars gathering in the parking lot.

I know not every police officer is represented by this behavior, some really are here to serve and protect, but it seems that more and more often we are seeing stories about police doing things like this… 

As they said in Hot Fuzz “there is no way you can perpetrate that amount of carnage and mayhem and not incur a considerable amount of paperwork.”